I recently took a week off for no particular reason other than the fact that I desperately needed a break. One of my many faults is that I allow myself to become so busy that I focus only on what needs to be done as I scramble to schedule a few minutes of time for living each day. Therefore, I didn’t want to have a schedule during my time off. My only objective was to relax and accomplish items on my task list without worrying about my outlook calendar. It felt so indulgent to have the luxury of focusing on what I wanted to accomplish and then follow through at my leisure without worrying about schedules and deadlines. The sense of freedom can be a powerful emotion and I felt a tremendous sense of freedom the entire week.
My plan was to try to complete a list of tasks that needed to be done, do some shopping, and spend time with family and friends. Toward the end of my time off I took a look at what was left to be done and was shocked when I realized that the task list which had seemed so intimidating a few days before was almost complete. Apparently I had been viewing my ‘to do’ list from a perspective rooted in my busy schedule and that had made things look more problematic than they actually were.
I emerged from my week of freedom and caught up on the news. The news was full of cruelty and war so I switched to the entertainment section which wasn’t any better because it was filled with gossip and criticism.
It seems as though being mean to others has become the new normal and the spirit of meanness is reflected in every facet of our society. Bullying is a serious concern in schools, an attitude of mean indifference is apparent as we watch children attempt to murder with no remorse, animals are tortured by people who have no respect for living things, and corporate conglomerates destroy the earth as they pour poison into our environment at an alarming rate even though cancer and other life threatening conditions are increasing to the point of being a common household conversation. Taking a break from the media raised my awareness on how indifferent the world has become.
A song on the radio by Pearl Jam called In Hiding reminded me of a friend who is a huge fan of Pearl Jam. He talks endlessly about the band and their music so I end up absorbing tidbits of information through sheer osmosis. The song In Hiding was influenced by the writings of Charles Bukowski. Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam was asked about the meaning of the song In Hiding in an interview and he said,
"The song was about taking a fast from life, doing anything to get yourself back in touch with something real. Abstinence from anything is cool, because the normalcy of life is deceptive: It's enjoyable for a while, and there are good moments, but sometimes that's not enough. You start questioning what's the point."
Interview with Eddie Vedder
Philadelphia inquirer 1998.
I think Eddie Vedder was onto something. After taking a week of fasting from my day to day routine I can see how easy it is to allow our lives become so saturated with the business of life, the cruelty in the news, the negativity of the gossip columns that it desensitizes us, My week of vacation without a schedule was my way of fasting from life so I could reconnect with 'something real.'
To be honest, I really don't care for the music of Pearl Jam but their lyrics have been the subject of some great conversations with my friends. I also like the spirit of their music even if I don't care for the music itself and I have enjoyed some of the literature that influenced their music, which is why I read Daniel Quinn's novel Ishmael which was the inspiration for the song Do The Evolution by Pearl Jam.
Daniel Quinn’s message is that mankind believes that they are the center of the Universe, discounting the value of other species. Quinn seeks to challenge this idea by speaking from the perspective of a Gorilla. He refers to Totalitarian Agriculture, which is defined as the notion that all food on the planet belongs exclusively to humans. He also references The Great Forgetting, which is a theory that society ignores the fact that humans are but one biological species among a whole community of biological species and that we are only one part of the system of life. Since life itself is not dependent on humans, then humans cannot be exempted from the biological system of life yet mankind acts as though the world was created exclusively for man alone while placing both industry and economy as the force for their existence. This forces people into a system that stifles and devalues both the system of life and a person’s individuality. Eventually people end up becoming just a cog in the machine.
What started me thinking about the book was when I heard Pearl Jam's song on the radio. The song was like a reminder that I have become too caught up with my ambition to succeed and, in doing so, I risk becoming just another cog in the machine.
A week off, a song on the radio, and memories of a book I read long ago reminds me that we humans are only one part of this circle of life, we are not the circle itself.
This was a productive vacation. Not only did I complete the items on my task list but I revisited a few basic truths about life:
- I like my job but my work is what I do, not who I am.
- My self-worth is not defined by the results of my productivity, by the house I own, my social status, or the balance in my bank account.
- Sometimes it is necessary to take a fast from my routine so I can reconnect with my own life.
- I am simply one part of the circle of life and the circle does not revolve around me The circle is made up of many parts.
In the beginning of the book Ishmael,(the Gorilla) asks “With man gone, is there hope for Gorilla?” At the end of the book, the Ishmael asks “With Gorilla gone is there hope for man?”
In an effort keep my perspective, I posted my own sign with two questions on a wall where I will see it every day to remind me of where I fit in the big picture. Hopefully this will help me stay in touch with what is real until my next vacation break.
Can the world survive without man?
Can man survive without the world?
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