Admissions

I recently read a book titled 'Admissions.'  A friend of mine loved the book and talked about it for weeks so, even though this type of read isn't what I normally reach for, a few weeks ago I was able to download the book onto my tablet for less than what I pay  for my coffee at Starbucks.   It turned out that I loved the book but the story started out so slowly that I began to have doubts about my ability to finish it. However, it was well worth reading about the incredibly boring life of the main character because those first few chapters actually set the stage for an very engaging story. The book is about a woman who was hurt once so she lived her life cautiously without taking risks and at middle age realized how much she had been missing. Although the book was very well written, as the author wove a story about the main character's daily life I struggled to understand why anyone would choose to live such Vanilla life when there are so many other flavors of living to explore.  Then it occurred to me that over the last year I have compartmentalized my own life into a series of  duties and my life was sounding very similar to the character of this story.


There have been a few other times in my life that I avoided going outside of my comfort zone for one reason or another, but I  eventually realized that my life had become a little too routine so I then made it a point to explore the adventures that waited just beyond those boundaries.   This is one of those times.




The book was a reminder to me but my inspiration actually came from a surprising source.  Over the last year I have spent a lot of time with my mother and  the people in mom's assisted living. What I noticed is that the people that are thriving are the adventurous ones  while those who are afraid to  reach beyond their comfort zone seem to  be withering away.  I found  inspiration for my own life by watching those who are in the final stage of theirs.  Grey hair, no hair, canes and wheelchairs they are still vibrant,  adventurous, not deterred by their setbacks.  My mother is a very social woman so she too is thriving now. This community has not only revived mom's spirit, it has also inspired me. With each visit I see something that makes me smile whether it be a group of elderly men dressed in fishing clothes with lures hanging from their hats, fishing poles balanced in one hand and a cane in the other while those confined to wheelchairs carry the tackle boxes as they slowly make their way to a shuttle which will take them to the lake for their weekly fishing trip.  There are a few ladies who like to race the elevators to see which one gets to the top floor first and I wasn't surprised to find that they were taking bets on the winner.  A few weeks ago I couldn't find my mother. The caregivers told me that she and her friends were on the patio having wine. When I found them I joined in for a chat and asked mom "What is in your glass?"   She looked guilty and said "Kool Aid?"  I just laughed and told her "Your doctor said an occasional glass of wine is OK. Enjoy your wine."  Her friend then pointed to her walker and said "We just need to be careful not to get caught when we drink and drive." 

 

 I always envisioned a senior center to be a series of crafts and Bingo games but I didn't want that for my mother. The residence where my mom lives has a very active social group and  what inspires me is that I have not seen a Bingo card yet.

Watching a group of seniors relish the fun in life in spite of their setbacks has been inspiring.  The book was a reminder that emotional walls are built to keep the things we fear out, but they can also hold us hostage in a Vanilla world.  So, I have made it a point to do a few things outside of my comfort zone.  I went on a date or two, signed up for a class, went out with the girls on a weeknight, began to plan a vacation for myself, and I am making time to volunteer. For the first time in a long time I feel like myself again thanks to a great read and some feisty senior citizens.