Monday, July 9, 2012

In Memory of Sunshine

 A few years ago the company I work for created a new department. They chose a few key people from several areas and brought them together to build this unit from the ground up.  I was one of those people. The transition meant a longer commute for everyone plus the build out for our offices was behind schedule so we  were to be sitting in small cubicles for a  few months until construction was complete.

On my  first day in the new office the person sitting directly across from me came  walking in slowly while leaning heavily on his cane.  Before he sat down he began to complain about his chair, the location of his cubicle, and a variety of other petty things.  I said good morning and after replying he said "Get me some coffee."  To which I reply "I don't make coffee and I don't fetch it."  He looks up in astonishment and then points to his cane. "I struggle to get around."    I reminded him that he made it from the parking garage to our floor and the men's room is next to the break room. If he can make it to one, he can make it to another.  He spent another twenty minutes or so complaining about various things before he got up to get his own coffee.  When he came back he had another list of complaints  until I finally said,"Please! If I have to listen to you gripe endlessly for the time we are in these cubicles I am going to ask them to move me."  His reply was "Well, in my previous office my assistant would have a cup of coffee and doughnut waiting for me every morning.  Her name was Anabelle. You look like Anabelle."  I told him "Well guess what Sunshine, I am not  Anabelle." 

I went out of my way to be extra cheerful and he would remind me that he was getting his OWN coffee and I would reply that the exercise is GOOD for him as he huffed off toward the break room chuckling under his breath.

One morning I walked in and cheerfully said  "Do you know what I heard on the radio this morning?"  
"Monster Mash?" he grumbles
"Nope" I say perkily.  " I was listening to John Denver sing  Sunshine on My Shoulder."  
He immediately says "Oh, and you thought of me." 
I laughed and exclaim "Exactly!" I then told him that I was going to call him sunshine going forward. 
He didn't say much but about an hour later he turns around and tells me "I am going to call you Anabelle because you look like her even if you don't get my coffee."  I laughed and said that I have been called worse.

Oddly enough, that was the start of a wonderful friendship.  Sunshine needed back surgery and had a few other health issues but he was like the little train that refused to give up. I refused to coddle him but would help him lift heavy files or pull something out of bottom drawer.  Even after we moved into our offices we would drop by each other's office to share news or to just talk. One day he says to me "Anabelle, why are you single?"  I replied "No one can put up with me!"  He laughed as he said "No argument there!"  Sunshine had a huge heart of gold.  People  just had to get past the crust and dust first.  He was generous to a fault and never hesitated help  anyone.  His biggest weakness was his grandchildren and his biggest fear was becoming useless.  We talked about how he lost his first wife to breast cancer, after two failed marriages he realized he would never find what he had, we talked about being a single parent, and how he missed the love of his life every single day.

"It isn't what we take when we leave this world behind us,
it is what we leave behind us when we go."
Three Crosses
By; Randy Travis

Today I was told  that Sunshine passed away. As tears blurred my vision I recalled a gravestone I saw once with engraving that read:  MOM, who was the sunshine of our lives. 
Losing a friend is a painful reminder that life is fragile.  How people remember us depends on how we touch their lives while we are on this earth. My friend was the sunshine for many lives, especially mine.  I miss him already.

I am sending flowers with a card that says, "In memory of my friend Sunshine who brought a ray of sunlight into my world.  Regards, Anabelle."

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